


two centuries is nothing now that i've seen you again

by chaerubims



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-21
Updated: 2019-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-09 07:55:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21886363
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chaerubims/pseuds/chaerubims
Summary: a memory flashes in her mind for a millisecond that jungeun almost fails to catch it. despite that, she reminisces the night her first life ended. nearly two hundred years have past, yet it still sits in her memory vividly. the emotional scars it left are still fresh, and evoking that very recollection is like rubbing salt  to the wounds, sending a pang through her heart. it's five shy of two centuries still, but even through the countless lives the now-blonde woman underwent, nobody can replace the gap in her heart left by the only woman she's learned to love.
Relationships: Jung Jinsol | Jinsoul/Kim Jungeun | Kim Lip
Comments: 2
Kudos: 43





	two centuries is nothing now that i've seen you again

**Author's Note:**

> finally wrote a loona one-shot that doesn't need trigger warnings... or does it? 
> 
> i've had a lot of fun writing this (i'm sorry it's short, the draft is even shorter- it's little shy of 900 words) so i hope you'll like it! heavily based on an entry for the #ManilaEncounters tag on twitter. expect grammar errors and typos as english isn't my first language and i've barely proofread this. comments are welcomed whether they're positive feedback or constructive criticism. 
> 
> [ originally posted on aff under wizorbit. ]

a brunette in her mid-20's struggled to keep her head above the surface.

still, that didn't stop her from trying. she'll swim, and swim, and swim until she can finally peek the dark skies, the wreck of the galleon she just stood on a few hours ago, the other casualties floating around the sea, and the occasional strikes of lightning that sends a small current to her spine. it jolts throughout her body, paralyzes her for a few seconds, and once more she is beneath the waters, struggling to ascend, to breathe.

it doesn't take long before a hand wraps around her waist, pulling her upwards. she opens her eyes, meeting her lover's own. despite the long, black hair that's covering the other girl’s face, jungeun doesn't fail to notice the multiple scars gracing it. still, she was ethereal, even in their dying moment.

there are hiccups, and hot tears flowing down their faces- it's not evident, but it's hard to miss it, especially when jungeun's hand carefully cups her face as if she was holding delicate glass, as if the other would break if she accidentally held it with a little more strength. “i can't go further, jungeun. i'm sorry,” the ravenette whispers shakily, and it makes jungeun weep. “hold on a little more, please, for me…” she cries out, desperately, but the girl just beams painfully wide. “i love you,” she breathes out, forcing a beam on her lips. “i know.” jungeun says before the former lets her go. the girl falls into the sea, and it takes everything in jungeun not to dive down for her.

jungeun doesn't stay long on the surface; the air in her lungs slowly voids, inevitably getting filled with a mix of saltwater, oil, and the blood of people who passed during the accident: most importantly, the blood of the woman she was supposed to marry.

_ but that was 1824, and this is 2019. _

a tickling, wet feeling on her feet jolts jungeun awake. she finds janggun at the edge of her bed, licking the base of her feet, staring at her as if the dog was expecting something. her eyebrows scrunched as she stared at her not so little hound who moved towards her plate.  _ oh my god, that's important- _ her thought ceases, as she stares at the diorama of a two-storey house, or at least, what's left of it. tears build up in the corner of her eyes-  _ god fucking damn it, janggun! _ jungeun curses in her mind, and she has every right to. after all, a week of sleepless nights and a bunch of scars and cuts is what it took to build that plate for her major.

it's the wee hours of the night, jungeun can tell without difficulty. the moonlight is peeking through her window and a lot more stars than usual are present in the deep, navy sky, so it's pretty easy to. she just doesn't care, however, as she screams, “janggun! what the hell?!” it resonates, breaking the calm of the kim residence. there's a faint “ _ jungeun, shut the fuck up and go back to sleep! _ ” in the background that’s certainly from her mom, but how the hell can jungeun sleep in this state? it's impossible, seeing a plate you've worked your ass on the past week (that's due in a few days, too) go down to waste in god knows how quick.

the tears flow down way too easily, and she pulls her hair, grits her teeth in frustration. soon enough, jungeun finds herself bawling her eyes out at 2:57 am, her face buried in her palms. anyone stealing a glance through her window would suppose she's just gone a horrible breakup, struggling to move on. she wails, pulls her hair more, screams, kicks her feet like a child throwing tantrums.  _ what am i gonna do now? _ she ponders.  _ i need to pass that damned subject, else i'll delay my march… again, _ she lets out a dejected sigh.

kim jungeun is a fourth (but is it still counted as her fourth year? she's been a fourth year for three years now. should we say sixth, instead?) year frustrated architecture major. she's been struggling to earn her diploma because of the very same subject her plate was for. the last three years have been rough for her, as her final plates are consistently ruined by her dog, janggun. she's been trying her very best to keep the mongrel out of her room (from putting janggun in a cage, tying her, letting her sleep in their backyard, locking her door- she's done everything she could think of. how janggun never fails in its nightly visits to her room is beyond her, really) but it  _ always _ finds its way to jungeun's room, to her projects.

she’s been drowning in her sorrows without rest that she misses the yellow-orange tint that fills her bedroom, the light crawling through its aperture. there's a soft knock on her door, followed by the gentle, husky voice of her older sister. “jungeun-ah, it’s almost 6 already, wake up and let's have breakfast,” jeongyun says quietly from behind the hatch. the former raises her head and wipes her tears, tries her best to calm herself down. “i-it's a s-satur-saturday, j-jeongyun unnie.” she states a bit firmly despite fumbling over her words. it's a slightly see-through mask she puts on, to hide the fact that she's had one of the roughest nights of this life. her older sister senses it, however. jungeun can't really hide anything from her.

“were you crying, dongdong?” jeongyun cracks the door open and peeks her head in. the sight that welcomes her is… something, for lack of better word. there are fragments of a building model on the floor, there's a white ball of fluff named janggun wagging its tail, barking softly at a sniffling jungeun who's sat at the corner of her bed, hair a mess, trying to wipe her tears. “well shit. what happened here, eun?” the older asks, her voice quiet and tone warm, moving towards jungeun. once she nears the latter, her hands automatically reach for jungeun's back, rubbing circles comfortingly. “i-i wo-woke up at l-like, 2 in- in the m-morning, a-and ja-jang-janggun was there, m-my plate was- was a-already a me- a mess.”

a frown makes its way to jeongyun's face. she's seen how destructive jungeun can be, and certainly doesn't want her sister to go through hell and back for the third time. she breathes, “go out and relax for a while. return at dinner or whenever you want, go wherever you want to go, i don’t care. just don't enter this house while you're stressed- i'll fucking lose it if you start screaming at 3am because of your damn project. i'm gonna help you rebuild this thing, i'll lock janggun in my room. for now, do whatever you want. take it as the calm in between the storms.” jeongyun's tone is authoritative, and the younger kim almost shivers visibly- after all, jeongyun's had a time as a medic for the army, and then promoted into a liutenant. she's not one to be joked around, especially when her eyes look down upon you and her lips purse in a slight frown, conveying her seriousness.

there's a hint of fear in jungeun's eyes as she nods slowly before rising and walking to the bathroom, not once gazing back at her older sister. jeongyun lets a sound sigh before grinning softly, that’s the kim jungeun she knows.

how jungeun ended up in seoul is a mystery. one minute, she was pedalling west of their humble abode, the neighbourhood's pond in mind. the other, she finds herself in the middle of seoul like a lost child. the sole of her shoes only touched the soil of seoul a few times, and even then, the memories of doing so are vague, blurry, almost like her thirteen year-old self buried them all somewhere far in her brain. the blonde can only recall one memory as clear as day, almost like the events partook yesterday. she remembers her neighbour, jiwoo, pulling her by the hand with sooyoung (who the former met, in “odd circumstances that jungeun doesn't have to know”, even though the lass resided in the outskirts of busan) in tow, straight to the han river.

she doesn't exactly know where she is in seoul, but she points her bike northeast, a determined look adorning her features. her feet, almost like it has mind of its own, started pedalling. the next thing she knew, she was at hangang bridge, staring down at the waters. jungeun's hands stroke the railings of the bridge, her eyes flickering close, a gentle smile caressing her lips. a cold breeze sends shivers down her spine (but it doesn't really matter now, does it?) as she exhales loudly, contentedly. she's back here, at the han river, by accident. so, tell her, why does it feel so right?

a memory flashes in her mind for a millisecond that jungeun almost fails to catch it. despite that, she reminisces the night her first life ended. nearly two hundred years have past, yet it still sits in her memory vividly. the emotional scars it left are still fresh, and evoking that very recollection is like rubbing salt to the wounds, sending a pang through her heart. it's five shy of two centuries still, but even through the countless lives the now-blonde woman underwent, nobody can replace the gap in her heart left by the only woman she's learned to love.

it's pretty hard to find someone new, really; it doesn't help that no one lives up to the diaphanous, warm ravenette who was supposed to tie the knot with her in 1826.

there are lot to rue in numerous lives you'll live in the span of more than two hundred years, but jungeun supposes she'll never, ever feel something close to the remorse she had in choosing to sail that one night. maybe, maybe,  _ maybe _ , if she put more thought in her decision making, she would've married her first and only love- hell, maybe they could've established a buoyant, serene family together! a million maybes and what if's occasionally (read:  _ always _ ) cross jungeun's mind, and what dejects her is the fact that she'll never,  _ ever _ find the answers to her questions. it doesn't stop her from wondering what their future would have been, though, even if all of it is locked in the past.

jungeun's cheeks displayed a rosy hue as her stomach roared loudly. she should've seen it coming, after all, her wristwatch tells her it's an hour and a half past lunchtime and she hasn't grabbed anything to chew on as she pedalled here. problem is, jungeun barely has any money left in her wallet, and she certainly didn't know where to go. she's too absorbed in her inner conflict (it's her tendency- she takes everything to heart  _ and _ mind) to notice a much smaller blonde creeping up to her. it takes everything in her not to screech when said tiny blonde's hand meekly settles on her broad shoulders. jungeun turns, horrified, but the feeling gets washed when she is greeted by a petite woman, probably around her age, who donned pineapple blonde locks, staring at her seemingly terrified.

“um, you seem conflicted, and… i know it's a high probability that i got the wrong idea, but  _ please _ , don't jump,” the smaller woman says demurely, shrinking into her turtleneck, hiding a tranquil beam. “...if you need to talk about it, i'm gonna listen, i promise! so don't jump, i'm begging you.” she adds, earning herself a chuckle from jungeun. “i wasn't going to jump, not that i was debating whether i should or not, either. you see, i came here straight from my house, and i don't live very near… i'm from cheongju, i don't even know how i managed to reach seoul with a bike, but here i am in front of you… thing is, i’m not familiar with the city, so i don't know where exactly should i fill my stomach. sure, i can just head anywhere, but i also kind of… left most of my money,” she explains, giggling a bit more when she catches the way the other's face brightens with every word. “oh, and i'm jungeun, by the way. kim jungeun.”

the smaller woman shakes jungeun's extended right arm with her left, this time, grinning widely at her. “i'm chaewon! park chaewon! i know a place, it's not gonna cost us much… unless you don't trust me, or you don't like tteokbokki, but which korean hates tteokbokki? oh, that, or you brought less than 10,000 won. that's stupid, though. who would carry around such small amount?” the lass, now identified as chaewon, rambles on. it brings a tender smile to jungeun's lips-  _ she's so much like her. _ “hey, jungeun, are you okay? why are you smiling like an idiot?” the question catches the latter off-guard. who knew such words can leave the mouth of a woman who speaks in size 1 font?

jungeun shakes her head. “it's nothing, chaewon. you just remind me of someone very dear,” she explains, and the latter nods in understanding. “well then! we better get going, you seem  _ very _ hungry.”

the ride to the tteokbokki place was far from awkward, even further from boring. jungeun stayed silent mostly, while chaewon did all the talking. the smaller girl told stories of running around town with her best friends heejin and hyunjin, sneaking out to the incheon international airport to hopefully catch a glimpse of renown opera singer jo haseul and her little step-sister im yeojin, running into hyunjin's cantonese cousin kahei at a 7-eleven, and a chance encounter with her now girlfriend hyejoo, who she ever so often takes on trysts. jungeun learns that chaewon is a very talkative chick who dips her head in everything (she's born in 2000, yet she's tried various sports- even more than jungeun has. the latter supposes it's her past lives peeking through her current soul, maybe she's been an olympian many times, for different events, more than the sports jungeun's ever tried), yet she eventually settled on ballet. she has auditions this saturday, but she’s not one bit nervous- chaewon is blessed with an armor of overflowing fortitude, unrivaled by anyone. jungeun admires the younger for that.

blue. the façade of the place chaewon’s been bragging about is painted in a sky blue hue, and it muses jungeun. after all, tteokbokki emonates a fiery red-orange colour, contrasting the cool blue of the façade (and, apparently, its interior, too). she has a good feeling about this place, mainly thanks to chaewon and all her words of praise (she claims she's been here countless of times. her little rendezvous with hyejoo almost always took place in this very shop, so she treasures it a lot). somehow, jungeun has this feeling that something enthralling would happen later on, and it galvanizes her petite frame, her new soul.

apparently, she doesn't have to wait that long as the sight that welcomes her after being dragged by chaewon beguiles her to the core.

a sense of familiarity hits jungeun, and warmth spreads throughout her body. tears well in her eyes, and she does her very best not to tackle the woman manning the counter. said woman also sports long, golden blonde locks (jeez, korea! how many blondes do you treasure?) that flows up to her bottom chest, with brows of the same colour, lips stained red, perfectly carved eyes that stared straight into jungeun's soul. there's a scar resting between her currently arched eyebrows that the latter notes- it’s a new addition to the new girl's features. it certainly wasn't there at her last apparition to jungeun. she wonders what exactly happened, but figures it doesn't matter because it doesn't diminish her beauty, anyway.

the woman behind the counter grins sheepishly, “chaewon! you're back!” she calls out, and the mentioned teen waves excitedly. “i made a new friend! jungeun, this is-” chaewon exclaims, making an effort to raise her volume (it's a size 4 font now, not so tiny anymore, right?), only to be cut off by the damsel beside her. “...jinsol,” jungeun breathes, staring at the cashier in awe, who in return shoots her a quizzical look. “i'm sorry, do i know you…?” the employee- now identified as jinsol- asks, tilting her head and pouting her lips slightly. chaewon mimics her actions, and jungeun would've chuckled if they were in an entirely different context.

jungeun blinks twice before shaking her head. “ah, i'm sorry, your name tag said… haha anyway, i'm jungeun, i met chaewon a while ago and she brought me here, so… i'm sorry is this weird to you? i mean i did read your name out loud when i wasn't supposed to, and i did stare for like a couple of seconds so, like, it's okay if you think the situation is peculiar or-” she rambles, her voice falling every now and then. jinsol cuts her off with a chuckle, though. “it's fine, it's fine. what can i get you though, chaewon, jungeun?” she asks with a friendly beam. it melts the latter's heart and oh god, it felt so, so good.

chaewon, however, snorts. “jinsol, you only serve tteokbokki. what else would we get?” she mocks, and jinsol grins, annoyed. “we also have eomuk and bungeoppang, chae. try looking at our menu for once.” the blonde behind the counter claps back, shutting chaewon up. jungeun lets out an amused chuckle and strides closer to jinsol. “i think i'll try everything. give me a serving of tteokbokki, three sticks of eomuk and one bungeoppang. that's costing me 3,500 won, correct?” she flashes a genuine smile, earns herself a nod. “we just opened, so it might take a long while to serve the bungeoppang. are you willing to wait, jungeun?” jinsol asks as if she's challenging her customer (it feels like they forgot chaewon was right there- they did- so she just opts to sit and wait for he two's encounter to unfold. it doesn't bug her, anyway; if anything, it amuses her a lot. she's definitely hyejoo later).

_ waiting is nothing, jinsol. i've waited two hundred years for you. those two centuries are nothing now that i've seen you again, though. it's worth it, you're worth it. _ is what jungeun wants to say, but she keeps her mouth zipped (jungeun may remember, but not everyone. she's never met someone with the same ability to recall their previous lives. it's both a blessing and a curse.) as to not stir any more confusion from jinsol. instead, she beams widely, “yes.” she utters loudly, courageously, even if seeing her reincarnation can take two hundred years. “i'm willing to wait.”

jinsol is back in the flesh, jungeun swears she'll cherish this, never let it slip- she vows to keep jinsol and never, ever let her go. not to any other person, not even to the gods of death.


End file.
